‘The stay-at-home father from the street always walks behind the pram with cans of beer’
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Nothing in life is black or white, and parenting always brings dilemmas. Even if the choice seems so clear at times.
Miranda (32) is married to Mark (34) and full-time mother of Mila (6), Mats (5) and Tibbe (2).
“Live and let live is my motto. Something I did learn when I became a mother for the first time and received unsolicited advice and judgment from all sides. Everyone interprets parenting in their own way, and in the end most children grow up safely. I, too, am not infallible, and occasionally dabble a bit – and not only in the upbringing.
Still: when my child crosses the street without looking and is almost hit by a car, I am happy when someone intervenes. And if my child is in an unsafe environment, I hope someone points this out to me.
Half liter of beer
For months now I’ve been meeting a stay-at-home dad from the neighborhood almost every day when I walk the dog during the day. He behind the stroller with his daughter, not even a year old, me with Tibbe by the hand. We greet each other kindly, sometimes have a chat. Alone, always – whether it’s ten o’clock in the morning or two o’clock in the afternoon – he walks with half a liter of beer in his hand.
“Always – whether it is ten o’clock in the morning or two o’clock in the afternoon – he walks with a beer in his hand”
The last few times we chatted I looked at it knowingly and since then I’ve seen him quickly cross the street a few times when he saw Tibbe and me coming. I see, what the hell am I interfering with, but I’m worried.
Read also – Rather not drink alcohol: ‘I always have to explain why I don’t drink’ >
A wipe sign
His daughter looks healthy and well cared for, her mother is a nice woman who works full time. I wonder if she knows about her husband’s drinking. At the same time, of course, I don’t know whether that drinking is really problematic, although at least two half liters for two seem like a bad sign to me.
‘Yes, what about you and your girlfriends, with your prosecco drinks, the children are among them, aren’t they? Or at our dinner parties with a bottle of wine?’ my husband objected when I told him about my dilemma. I don’t want to delve into other people’s private affairs either, but recently during a chat in the supermarket I cautiously remarked to the mother: ‘Poe, I think it’s tough, full-time worries, I could sometimes have a glass of wine at lunch. want to take a break – how does your husband like it?’
She responded with a steely look that he loves it, and she was right, so I had to leave it at that. In the meantime, I still watch him with suspicion, if only to be able to intervene if something happens to his child under my eyes.”
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