‘Is my son (8) too old to shower with me?’
Sometimes you can’t figure it out on your own and you could use some advice. Every Tuesday a reader therefore tells about her dilemma.
Susan (40) and her ex co-parent son Ryan (8) and daughter Robin (5).
“That my first child turned out to be a boy was a bit of a shock at first. I grew up without a father, in a family of five sisters. My older sisters all had daughters. And here I came. With a penis in my stomach, as I jokingly cried from the moment my child’s testicles appeared on the ultrasound screen. Everyone thought it was fantastic, finally a man in our female family. I just hoped that he wouldn’t like football too much.
Also read – ‘What, are you in the bath with your child?’ >
cuddler
My wish came true: Ryan is not a boy who lives up to the clichés. He likes tinkering and biology, is extremely sensitive and a dream of a nurturing brother for his sister. And: he adores me. He prefers to lay next to me all day long, and warble how sweet and beautiful I am. My daughter is also a cuddler, but not nearly as affectionate. She prefers to kick a ball with her father, or flutter to her neighbor girls after a quick kiss after school.
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Shower together
Their father and I have been divorced for two years now. In good harmony, but since they were only three and five at the time, I made it a habit from day one to shower with them at night. So efficient; this way I could keep an eye on them and was immediately ready for the night.
Robin stopped doing it herself a few months ago, she could now really do that on her own. But Ryan still wants to take a bath with me. He is tall for his age, and slowly but surely it feels more and more uncomfortable, that big, naked boy’s body in the shower cubicle with me.
Cautiously I have asked a few times if he is not big enough to be able to do it himself now. But he doesn’t like that, he says. I don’t want to reject my child, but I wonder: isn’t my son too old to shower with me?”
More episodes of the dilemma? Every Tuesday there is a new story on KekMama.nl. Read the previous dilemmas here.
