“Why can’t one girl camp with eight boys in a garden?”

July 4, 2022 Luisa Rey

Patricia van Liemt is a radio host, writer and mother of Maria (12) and Phaedra (9). Every Friday she writes accurate, honest, funny and above all recognizable columns about her life and motherhood.

Jeez lowies, I’m finding something about it again. It was two whole issues that preoccupied me this week.

Why is the size 158 top pre-shaped? And why can’t one girl camp with eight boys in a garden?

Welcome to the world girl

Let’s take a closer look at the first issue. My oldest daughter went to the beach with her grandpa and bonus grandma and got to pick out a new bikini. Party of course! She came home with a super cute army green bottom with a top with golden elements. I completely understood that as a 12-year-old she thought this was the bomb.

But what did my great mother surprise sketch. The top had molded cups! Size 158?! Yoohoo, why? What signal are you sending here? That a girl of 1 meter and 58 centimeters, on average about 11 or 12 years old, should already have breasts? And if this bikini might also have been liked by someone with dwarfism, it still suggests that we should all have nice, large, contoured breasts. Yes, and we’ll start with that if you have size 158. Whoops. Welcome to the world, girl.

“I think it’s really ridiculous. Stereotype and incredibly sexist”

And then she also has a mother who is really for ‘free the nipple’. Poor child of mine, can you hear our kitchen table conversations yet? No, all kidding aside. I think it’s really ridiculous. Stereotyped and incredibly sexist.

Also read – Patricia: ‘Free my boobs! Or not?’ †

Camping

Then the second issue, which I need your help with: two girls and eight boys went camping in the yard. Very nice idea, right at the end of the school year. Only then one of the girls could no longer, so that the other girl was suddenly no longer allowed. Because one girl and eight boys suddenly wasn’t a good idea.

All the kids were angry and disappointed. Well logical, I thought. And what signal do you send these ‘innocent’ 12-year-old children? I think you put the gender gap back on the map completely with this statement, yes I’m putting the language on a technical level.

“What signal are you sending these ‘innocent’ 12-year-old children with this?”

I especially felt sorry for the boys, because it’s nice when such a prejudice is thrown at you at such a young age. Think with me for a moment. If as a 12-year-old boy you are already dismissed as a potential attacker and society often claims these kinds of things about ‘your kind’, are we not heading for a self fulfilling prophecy off? And then nothing changes at all.

Well, it wasn’t my daughter that one girl. And when I look very deep into my heart (the foundation of which was laid by a Boomer) I really understand the parents of that other girl.

But I like it anyway. And maybe now you too…

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