‘My child has become insensitive to the phenomenon of rewards’

Before you had kids you knew for sure: those little rascals would never stare at a tablet for more than five minutes, get to bed on time and all without a bribe. But now that they are there it turns out to be a different soup.

Elaine (34): “I’m pretty lazy. When my son Sam (3) spends an hour on the tablet, I think: nice and quiet. I also do few ‘fun things’ such as swimming, going to an amusement park or such a play screaming paradise, because I just don’t feel like it.

But when my son has eaten his bread and wants a mini-Magnum at eight in the morning, he gets it: ‘Okay, one then.’ I also regularly give him presents in between, just like that. I now notice that this is not convenient with potty training. My child has become completely insensitive to the phenomenon of rewards.”

Read also – Not exactly responsible, but effective: ‘My ultimate resort is bribery’ >

Mom always says yes

Inge (39): “My three kids always ask me for everything instead of my husband, because I always say yes. I’m also into bribing: ‘If you go to the store now, we’ll get an ice cream later.’

“An activity is now linked to buying, buying, buying…”

That works great, but the result is that they now want to consume something at every turn. Nowadays an activity is linked to buying, buying, buying… Just going to the beach is no longer an option. No, if we go to the sea, we should also eat a smoothie bowl or drink a coke. If I have a good moment and still say no, I regret it after five minutes and say yes after all. And yes, the children now know that too.”

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