‘Everything that could go wrong, went wrong on our vacation’

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Fatigue and stress caused a lot of hassle in Irma’s relationship. And then her vacation ended completely in the soup.

Irma (38): “In a year and a half we had a daughter and our twin sons. Those were tropical years. Teun and I took all the fatigue and stress off each other. The cliche: The one closest to you gets the most blows.

scare

I turned into the specter I never wanted to be. An aggrieved, nagging woman who thought she had to pull the cart alone. Teun said we could get a cleaning lady or babysitter, but I cut that off right away. To which Teun performed even less at home out of recalcitrance. He probably didn’t dare to do that either, I had comments on everything anyway. We never had sex, let alone the giggles or a good conversation. I was up. Sometimes I caught myself thinking that maybe it would be easier to do it alone. Then at least you know where you stand, such an idea.

Also read: Keeping your relationship good after the tropics: ‘We grew completely apart’

‘Everything went wrong on vacation’

Last year we went to Italy by car. Teun had actually arranged everything for the holiday, but everything that could go wrong, went wrong. We had bad luck at the side of the road, our house was next to a busy train track, the air conditioning didn’t work, our toddler smashed from a staircase in a restaurant and I was sick to death of questionable king prawns. All the reasons to beat each other’s brains up, you would think. But just then I saw again why I had fallen for Teun as a young student. Teun who always remains calm. Who immediately takes the bull by the horns and arranges help or solves the problem itself. Teun who never panics, and holds my hair when I have to throw up. My Teun.

Turning point

Strangely enough, that holiday was a turning point. I suddenly saw Teun again as the sweet and faithful man, no longer as a burden on my leg. We survived the crisis. Only from now on I will choose our holiday address.”

This article was previously published in Kek Mama.

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