‘Even his new girlfriend moved in with us’
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With Elke (40) and Louis (43) the situation was clear from day one: Louis had another. Elke thought it was unthinkable to give their relationship another chance. The house was unsaleable, so they decided to split the house after the divorce.
Each: “It was unthinkable for me to give our relationship another chance. He loved her, he said. And mine, but different. more platonic. I thought I was going crazy. And what about our family? Our children, who were then five and eight? I cried my eyes out for a few weeks, then the anger came. But that too sank, and then, thank God, reason set in. If he no longer loved me, but someone else, who was I not to step aside? But in a way that would benefit everyone, I decided.
Divide
It was 2016, our house was unsaleable. Too big, too expensive, and it was just not in a desirable area. Louis didn’t have enough money to buy me out, and vice versa it was completely unthinkable. We decided to split the house. Louis moved into the double upstairs apartment, I the ground floor with garden. I converted the back room into two bedrooms and had a bathroom built in the utility room. It has become a lovely apartment.
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Under a roof
It is now three years later and Louis’ girlfriend Maaike has moved in with him. They have to go through my hall to the stairs to their house, but I’m fine with that. In the weeks that they take care of our children of – now – eight and eleven, it is very handy if everyone has access to the belongings of the children in my house. Conversely, I can always go in with them. In practice we don’t use it much, but we talk to each other every day and the children just run back and forth. We never have a babysitting problem.
In the current market we would probably lose our house just fine, but we actually like the situation. The children have kept the same life, only one has joined. Oh, and they suddenly have two bedrooms; one upstairs, and one near me, downstairs.
People sometimes think we have a love triangle. Others ask me how I do it, living with my ex and his girlfriend. But we don’t really live together, we only share a front door and have all the financial benefits of single parenthood. Louis also grants it to me when I get into a new relationship. How nice is it that we can combine all of this under one roof?”
This article was previously published in Kek Mama.
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