“We don’t hide anything from each other, until a few weeks ago…”

Kirsten Schilder (39) is married to singer Nick Schilder and mother of Nikki (12), Julian (10) and Jackie (6).

I hope my children will never keep secrets from me. Even if they have made mistakes, I want them to know that we still love them. I prefer to be kept informed of everything. But it is an illusion to think that I can ‘supervise’ everything. I only have a strict policy when it comes to internet and telephones. We have agreed on a 100% transparency policy and have nothing to hide from each other. At least until a few weeks ago…

Four legged new family member

After a long lobbying, Nick finally agrees: a four-legged new family member is coming. To convince him, the children even went for a walk around the park with an ‘invisible dog’ to prove that they really would walk him.

I wanted to keep the happy animal news hidden from our offspring for a while, in case it didn’t happen due to any unforeseen circumstances. There was a lot of communication with the owner of the litter beforehand. We texted daily and the photos poured in, just like the advice about what we should get at home.

Read also – This mother has doubts about a pet: ‘They drool and shed, but they are good for the upbringing’ >

Secrets

Because the kids sometimes borrow my phone for a game, I had to temporarily change my access code. This was, to put it mildly, not appreciated. “What are you hiding from us?” “We wouldn’t keep secrets from each other, would we?” “Mommy, I don’t understand this. I tell you everything!” They were right, of course, but I was speechless for a moment.

“This was, to put it mildly, not appreciated”

In protest, Nikki even changed her passcode, only to forget it, after which Nick had to spend half a day resetting her phone and SIM card. Finally, after about three days, I had no choice but to capitulate. The high word had to get out.

In a restaurant, just before dessert, we told them about our new addition. We had to dampen their enthusiasm, because they were screaming with happiness and the whole restaurant was looking at us. Fortunately, once they figured out the reason why I had denied them access to my phone, they were met with nothing but joy.

I may very much want my children to keep no secrets from me, but maybe it’s better that I don’t keep secrets from them.

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