Olga fled Ukraine: ‘My only thought was: survive, save my child’
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Olga (38) fled from Kyiv to the Netherlands in March 2022 with her son Andrii (12) and her dog.
“Before the war, I lived with my son Andrii in a nice apartment in Kyiv; his father and I divorced seven years ago. I had a good job as a finance director, worked hard, earned enough money. But I wasn’t really happy. I had no time for myself or to ask myself what I really wanted with my life. In fact, I knew I would rather help others. But I didn’t dare to take that step for fear of losing my money and reputation.
air-raid shelters
After the first bombs fell on Kyiv, I went to the basement of my old school with my parents, Andrii and our dog Funny. Acquaintances told us it was better to leave the city and go to a village nearby. They had contact with the government, so I followed their advice.
Now I know that it is in those villages that the most terrible things have happened, such as in Bucha. We sat there in a cold cellar for three days. Around us I heard rockets and the footsteps of Russians. I knew: they just have to open the door and they’ll find us here. I didn’t know how to protect myself and my son.
“I knew: they just have to open the door and they will find us here”
I called my son’s godfather, he picked us up and took us to a bus that would drive us to the Polish border. With 45 other women and children, we drove out of the country on roads with mines in three days. My only thought was: survive, save my child. Andrii did not complain, was patient, helped me. In the meantime, I calmed down the women on the bus, arranged hot food and a place for the children to sleep.
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March for Mothers
We were lucky that we could go to a wonderful family in the Netherlands. Andrii has just completed his Ukrainian online classes and is now being taught here at a Dutch school. And although my son said at first that his Ukrainian friends were enough for him, I see that he makes friends here too.
“It’s magical to get the right people together and help. That makes me so happy”
I read about a network of Ukrainian psychologists working for refugees and now work for them voluntarily, as a project manager. I also organize football matches for Ukrainian boys and I have set up a ‘March for Mothers’ for mothers from Ukraine. It is magical to put the right people together and help them. That makes me so happy.
Be an example
I have never felt so much hatred as now, because of the war. However, I consciously choose to stay positive. To get out of bed, even if I feel bad. I’m an example for Andrii, it wouldn’t be good for him to see me always sad. But I don’t always hide my pain. I’m only human, not a robot. In this way he learns that everyone can express their emotions, be vulnerable and need support.
I am especially concerned about my parents and brother who still live in Ukraine and still feel guilty that I had to leave them behind. If I hadn’t been a mother, I would never have run away. But I have a son, and I must protect him.
“I have a son, and I must protect him”
Recently Andrii said: ‘Mama, we were actually quite lucky. We now live in a beautiful house with the sweetest people, our family and friends in Ukraine are still alive, our apartment is still there, our dog is with us. And you are now doing work here that makes you happy.’
At those moments I think: he understands more about life than I do. I’ve lost everything, but it gives me so much freedom. Now I can finally do what I wanted to do and what my heart needs: helping people. Sometimes I can’t believe I’m doing all this. But now I think I can do anything because nothing can hold me back.”
This article appears in Kek Mama 09-2022.
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