“My ex wants everything to go exactly according to the parenting plan”

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Following the parenting plan closely for years after the divorce sounds ideal, because: a deal is a deal. But what if an exception is needed?

Sharon (42), mother of Maurice (13) and Danice (11):

“Maarten and I have a pleasant co-parenting relationship. We both go week on, week off. We live twenty minutes apart, with the children’s school in the middle. Sounds ideal, it often is. Only my ex has the flexibility of a stone. He doesn’t want to deviate from it.

Vacations and holidays are distributed exactly according to the agreements in the parenting plan from years ago. We once agreed that we would not trade days or weekends, to keep things as clear as possible for the children. That’s why family members have been celebrating their birthdays on my odd weekends for years, so that Maurice and Danice can be there.

Read also – ‘Should I ban my ex from going on holiday with our children for three weeks?’ >

Like a stone

Now my new parents-in-law will have been married fifty years in October and they have invited me and their bonus grandchildren for a week in Paris during the autumn holidays. Unfortunately, that is just Maarten’s vacation and he doesn’t want to swap with a week in another vacation. And so the party is off for us.

I suspect Maarten of a jealous act. He doesn’t have a new partner, it probably bothers him that the kids are having fun with my friend’s family. His arguments are also wrong. Our children are already so big that they can deviate from the fixed holiday schedule once in a while. But Maarten is adamant.”

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