‘It’s actually bizarre that such a tiny person needs so much stuff’

Ellen is a counselor in secondary special education, a thriller author at publisher De Fontein, mother of Lewis and Miles (11 and 8) from a previous relationship and she has just given birth to daughter Sophia with her boyfriend Nils.

This weekend I got the question again: ‘You must have already taken out all the baby stuff?’ My answer is always the same: ‘Everything. Everything was already gone.’ On the one hand I thought that was fine, because I now have a completely different taste than years ago, on the other hand I would have liked to have had something more. Babies cost a lot of money in the beginning.

So much stuff

It is actually bizarre that such a teeny little person of barely fifty centimeters needs so much stuff. In fact, they don’t need anything other than some clothes and diapers (if you’re breastfeeding), but you want something with that child, starting with a safe ride home from the hospital, so: Maxi Cosi. And while we’re on the subject of safety, an Isofix thing is not a superfluous luxury. By the way, let’s just take two, because we have two cars and otherwise you’ll be dragging that heavy case around. A bit of walking is also nice, so a pram is handy, and preferably an easy and cool thing. A playpen, of course, because with other children in the house you don’t constantly have your hands free to carry the baby around, and now that we’re starting over; a round with wheels please.

Even more shit

A baby room, and this time chic and hip matt black. Oh, such a veil is beautiful. Shit, the wall sucks all the paint, another can of expensive paint. Such a changing basket is über cool! The Tripp-Trapp (I once had two…) must also be black and of course it must have a newborn set on it. And look! At that one nice shop they sell teddy covers for the newborn set! I must have that. And wool slippers, also so hip. A baby nest, that was number one with a dot. A pump, and not a dairy cow case like eleven years ago (that sounded like a rusty lawnmower), but a wireless and rechargeable variant that you can stuff right into your bra. A good bottle warmer, always handy, and oh yes, a bottle is also easy. What else can you do with the bottle warmer?

urge to order

A co-sleeper, by the way, we must have one. Oh poop, our bed is half a meter higher. Can you still look for the child at night? An electric jug, of course. Just as long as they don’t think I’m going to mess around with boiled water and half cups of whatever in those aluminum cases. Indispensable: a baby carrier! And then a wearing jacket is also so nice. A bath (pink), a tummy tub, changing mats for upstairs and downstairs, blankets (knitted, cotton, teddy, everything), and I’m not even talking about the clothes. Finally a girl! The handmade clothes of those smaller entrepreneurs on Instagram are so much fun. The ladies must have burned out from my order urge. Oh, and Little Dutch’s Flowers and Butterflies series is too sweet. Also sometimes nice next to all the boys’ cars and trains. Of course there also had to be a playpen bag to pack everything from the Flowers and Butterflies series. Final standings: can Marie Kondo come over and get all that crap out of my house?

Also read: ‘I think it’s quite a thing, taking care of children who are not yours’

Several thousand euros

Look, everything above is correct, but I certainly handled it responsibly. I scored almost all the bigger stuff on marketplace (except the room) and I just liked supporting the smaller entrepreneur, so I ordered a lot from companies I knew through Instagram. Yet – without being crazy – you quickly lose a few thousand euros for a baby trousseau and that is actually idiotic. I enjoy all the stuff we bought for Sophia and I use it all (really). She lies in the box every day, she sleeps (under my watchful eye) during the day in her baby nest when I am writing, she always wears her slippers, we walk every day with the car or baby carrier and I pump regularly so that I also occasionally go out with the boys. Her room is beautiful – and so is the co-sleeper – but Sophia prefers to sleep next to me, so… well. That will probably still be used. Ever. As long as she wants to snuggle with me, I’ll keep her with me.

greedy

It was also very nice to look for the most beautiful stuff and I always think it’s great (and fun) to get to people via Marktplaats and give their stuff a new life. Luckily I’m out of the stage where it all has to be brand new. I was much more susceptible to that with Lewis. So yeah, what I said. In fact, a baby needs very little. I think it mainly serves the convenience of the parents, all that stuff. You can make it as crazy as you want and having a baby makes you greedy. But as long as a baby receives warmth, love, safe arms and (in Sophia’s case: a lot of) milk, they are already very satisfied.

More Ellen? Follow her on Instagram. You read her previous columns here back.

The holidays are just around the corner. Are you still looking for gift inspiration? We have a perfect Christmas deal for you: 4x Kek Mama magazine for only 15 euros. Kek Mama is the #1 glossy for mothers, with children from 0 to 12 years old. Kek Mama brings you honest stories, personal interviews and recognizable columns every month. Close the deal quickly, because gone = gone.