“Is co-sleeping with my 4-year-old son weird?”

A 24-year-old single father occasionally lets his 4-year-old son Jackson sleep in his bed. Not always: only if the boy misses his father or has had a bad dream. After his sister announced that she really didn’t think that was possible, the man wonders how strange that really is.

Jackson’s mother is no longer in the picture. The men are therefore dependent on each other. That’s why Jackson’s father desperately needs his family to help out every now and then. All the more difficult that it is precisely his sister that makes a problem with the fact that he occasionally lets 4-year-old Jackson sleep in his bed. On Reddit, the father explains what’s going on.

bad dream

He describes Jackson as an affectionate kid who likes to give out hugs and kisses. “Sometimes he comes to my room at night because he’s scared or misses me, and I let him sleep with me. He doesn’t do it often: usually only when he’s had a bad dream.’ Because the two have just moved and Jackson still has to get used to his new room, he now sleeps with his father a little more often.

‘Inappropriate’

That was never a problem until his sister stayed overnight. After everyone was asleep, Jackson sneaked into his father’s room. When the sister knocked on the door the next morning to ask who wanted breakfast, she saw the two lying in bed together. “She didn’t say anything at the time, but when we were in the kitchen she said she thought it was ‘inappropriate’.” His sister made it clear that she was afraid that people would get ‘the wrong idea’ – especially since Jackson is such an affectionate boy.

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hurt

“When I asked why that was wrong, she said I’m the father, not the mother, and that’s why it’s weird. She also pointed out that our father was never like us.’ She also added that her husband did not treat their son that way. Understandably, the father is hurt that his sister even suggests that. “I told her not to be a f*cking pervert just because her husband handles kids differently and she should mind her own business next time.” Zuslief called in their mother, who in turn is outraged at the fact that he called his sister a ‘pervert’.

Maybe not the best choice of words, but he felt attacked, the father explains. That’s why he turns to the Reddit forum. Is it really so weird that he’s co-sleeping with his 4-year-old son?

safe zone

“She sexualizes your relationship with your son, and she needs to know to mind her own business,” one commented. ‘So what about a 4-year-old climb into your bed every now and then and sleep there? That’s his safe zone. And now and if he gives you lots of hugs and kisses, that’s what little kids do. She has to accept that no child is the same and you only have a pair of parents, not two.’

Great with kids

Another person is particularly struck by the gender inequality that this problem suggests. “Putting the motherband above everything else is not good for anything. Not all women are caregivers. Some are just plain mean and shouldn’t even be near a child. Fathers are parents too, and if it is okay for one parent to immerse the child in love, it is okay for the other. Men are not inherently a threat to children. There are men who are great with children, take it or leave it men and mean men, just like women.’

Also not unimportant: because Jackson has only one parent, he depends on his father for hugs and unconditional love. If he now raises his child aloof, it will have enormous consequences for who Jackson will become as a grown man later on. Let’s just hope this kid stays in the cuddle phase for a long time to come.

Source: She knows

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