‘I don’t want to work less when I become a mother, now what?’
Image: Unsplash
Sometimes you can’t figure it out on your own and you could use some advice. Every Tuesday a reader therefore tells about her dilemma.
Aline (34) lives with Mark (35) and is pregnant with their first child.
“Call it naive, but when my boyfriend and I decided we wanted to have a kid, we really discussed everything except one thing: what we would do with our jobs. As an independent entrepreneur I am responsible for communication policy in the business world. A busy job that pays well, and in which I put all my heart and soul into it. I wouldn’t discount it for anything. Yes, quite ironic indeed that I missed an important piece of private communication. Because now I’m four months pregnant, and my boyfriend doesn’t want to step back in his hours either.
Working full time
My mother raised me on her own and worked full time all her life. I was never so aware that there is another way, but just that thought flies to my throat. I simply love my job too much and don’t want to think about being mentally dull. Although I realize that that love might pale in comparison to my feelings once our child is born.
Also read – ‘Fathers are allowed to work full time and away on weekends, mothers who do that are selfish’ >
Flexibility
Mark and I are both flexible about when we work, so we can get some work done in the evenings. If our child goes to daycare for three days and grandpa and grandma also come for a day, we have that way freed up that last day.
“I wonder if our plans aren’t a bit too ambitious”
So there is no need for the man, but I wonder if our plans are not too ambitious. In five months we will have to deal with sleepless nights, crying hours, and unforeseen flues, runny noses and other child suffering, which means that childcare is not an option. And then I won’t say anything about possible impending lockdowns. What doesn’t work, doesn’t work. So we can always decide to cut our hours anyway. But for now, this issue keeps me up at night. What now?”
More episodes of the dilemma? Every Tuesday there is a new story on KekMama.nl. Read the previous dilemmas here.
