‘I have been living with my ex in the same house for two years’

Amber has been living with her ex-wife in the house they bought together for over two years. ‘That may sound strange,’ she says, ‘but strangely enough, it works. When we decided to get a divorce, it was initially a strictly financial decision to keep both living in the house.’

Amber had always been the stay-at-home mom and couldn’t afford a new home on her own. “And my ex couldn’t afford the house on her own, so I stayed—for now.”

us vs them

Their children were six and eight at the time. ‘We tried to make it as stressful as possible for them at home,’ says Amber. ‘In this way, respect for each other and our friendship, even though we were divorced, formed the basis. We had an ‘us versus them’ mentality when it came to raising the kids. And of course, sometimes things were quite difficult. But we had the help of a mediator and coach, among other things, and were never harsh or insulting to each other. Not even when the pandemic started and we were on top of each other 24/7.’

Their children knew all along that they would one day leave the house with Amber, as soon as she found another home. “That was okay. They saw that the divorce was done in a respectful way and at the same time realized that some things will never change. For example, our love for them and the way we always stand together along the sports field, go to school performances, and so on.’

Rare

According to Amber, it is now time for the next step: a house of your own. “We both have new partners now and I am actively looking for a new home, along with the children.”

She knows that her situation is not obvious. ‘It is special that we have been able to make our divorce and co-parenting work in a healthy way for us and for the children. Today that seems to be rare. So I’m really thankful that I got married and then divorced someone who’s still a friend.’

Source: Scary Mommy

Also read:
‘People ask me how I do it, living with my ex and his girlfriend’ >