84% of children are allowed on a screen every day
From cell phones to TVs, screens are intertwined with our lives and that of our children. That the subject of digital upbringing is alive was evident from the response: more than 600 mothers were candid about the concerns, doubts, mistakes, but also about the blessing of virtual licorice.
There are few mothers who honestly admit that their toddler does not adhere to the guideline times of a maximum of one hour a day. Except in the large Kek Mama KPN Digital Upbringing Survey in which more than 600 mothers with children up to 12 years old participated and gave honest answers.
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screen time
The participating mothers indicated almost unanimously (96%) that they would like to raise their child digitally. No fewer than 78% even thought it was outdated to never let a child on the screen. After all, we can no longer ignore the digital world now that more and more schools are working with IWBs and teaching aids. But digitization has also started at home. 82% of us have four or more screens at home, 8% even more than ten. This mainly concerns interactive screens such as tablets, laptops, smartphones and game consoles.
78% of mothers think it is outdated never to leave a child on the screen
The vast majority of children, no less than 84%, are allowed on a screen every day. Sonita (33), mother of Jordan (8), says about this: “Whether you like it or not, computers belong in today’s world. I was kept short at home, I was not allowed to do anything with technology or the internet until I was fifteen. This has had a very negative impact, both in school and in my social life.”
Also read – Children and the internet: these are the pitfalls according to an expert >
And Annabella (30), mother of Roef (7), writes: “If we ban it completely, I think his focus on this will increase. This is the future and Roef will have to be able to deal with it at school. This makes it nice that he already knows how it works and what it is.”
“We teach them how to protect themselves, just like we do with road safety”
Kim (37), mother of Emma (12) and Lina (10): “Growing up in a digital age comes with risks. Risks never explained to me. I think it is important that my children learn to use the internet safely. My boyfriend and I are teaching them how to protect themselves and others, just like we do with road safety.”
moments of rest
In addition to educational motivation, being self-reliant and the time of today, convenience is also a very determining factor, according to the survey. Nearly six in ten readers (58%) admit that a screen is also an ideal way to keep children calm or quiet in a restaurant or airplane. Because of course you can entertain your child with a coloring book or a game, but sometimes the child is tired or bored and half an hour of Paw patrol is a lot more effective.
Or as Rosalie (37), mother of three-year-old twins, sighs: “Since they no longer take afternoon naps, I have trouble scheduling rest times for the girls one day. With half an hour Miffy memory or Bumba ABC they still sit still on the tablet.”
58% of mothers admit that a screen is also a way to keep their child calm
This is also the reason why readers now and then let the reins loose and ignore target times more or less set by themselves or by educators.
Lisa (37), mother of three sons, once devised a maximum screen time to prevent her boys from sitting on the tablet or PC all day after school or during the holidays. “They get an hour, sometimes a little longer, for example on a day off or on a rainy day. They are always allowed to watch a full-length film on Friday evenings, but we don’t count those.”
Guidelines
Educators have developed a general guideline about screen times. It is quite strict and tight. For example, they advise children up to two years not to look at screens at all. That is not suitable for their development – exercise, food and sleep would be best.
Yet readers think more easily about this: 70% let her baby watch a movie for one to two hours every day. 12% even do that for three to four hours. Convenience is also a big factor here. Demi (27), mother of Poppy (11 months): “When I go cooking I put my daughter in her seesaw baby TV† I’m afraid she will fall asleep if I put her in the box around dinner time, this will drag her through the difficult evening. Plus, I have my hands free.”
“If your child sleeps enough, hangs out with friends, plays, performs at school and sports, he can also play for a few hours”
Incidentally, there are also experts who doubt the need for adjusted screen times. They say that you can look much better at the balance in a child’s life: if he or she sleeps enough, hangs out with friends, plays, performs at school and sports, he can also play for a few hours. There is no need for a time limit per se.
Don’t always be the bogeyman
Fortunately, our readers do not respond to politically correct answers in the survey, but tell them frankly how things go at home. For example, more than a quarter (27%) of all children aged eight and nine spend three to four hours a day behind a screen, whereas the aforementioned parenting experts think one and a half hours is more than enough.
62% of mothers play digital games with the children
Candid answers are given: ‘Otherwise there is no land to sail with them’, ‘I want to sleep in at the weekend’, ‘When we are visiting and there are no other children’ and ‘Then I can take the youngest one unhindered (chest )to feed’. But also corona times in which working from home was promoted and you simply did not have time to spend hours with your child Lego or quartets was an often heard argument for some extra hours on the tablet.
Sarah (39), mother of Job (12), Okke (10) and Evie (7), admits it frankly: she just doesn’t have a backbone when it comes to screen time: “I don’t want to be the bogeyman when it comes to being begged. So go ahead, one more game or movie. But, to excuse this, it is often necessary for school.”
This is also apparent from the survey; 16% of children use a screen for school. That does not compare to the other applications: to watch a video (47%), to play games (27%) or social media (6%).
The right example
91% of the readers responded with a resounding yes to the statement ‘As a parent you have to set a good example and dose your own screen use in front of your child’. But is that also true if we check it? ah. Then we seem inclined to quickly check social media in between or to binge an episode of a series on the tablet – even in front of the children.
“After a whole day of cleaning and taking care of myself, I just want to hang out for a while and do nothing”
Nearly half of all women say they spend one to two hours a day looking at a screen while her children are around her. Two in ten even do this for three to four hours. Charmaine (29), mother of Florine (3.5): “After a whole day of cleaning, taking care of and being with my daughter, I also just want to hang out for a while and do nothing. Then I put Flo next to me on the couch with YouTube and I myself scroll through my timeline or Candy Crush. Wonderful me time.”
Only with permission
Just because Kek Mama readers might be a little generous when it comes to screen times, that doesn’t mean we’re easy on what our child does or doesn’t see. In any case, 83% of all children are only allowed to use a tablet, telephone or computer with permission and we keep a close eye on what the (small) children are up to on the screen. 29% only have apps on the tablet that are suitable for children. A quarter (24%) always watches and listens, or does so now and then (27%). 12% regularly checks the search history.
Most mothers are very firm about communicating with others online: only 16% think it’s okay, 16% forbid it and 66% have it set up so that it is not possible. There are several parental control tools for Android (Google Family Link app) or Apple (Parental Control App Kidslox) that are very useful to add to your own phone. 89% of all readers have access to all apps that their child downloads via such an extra tool or child’s account.
Also read: This is how you ensure that your child uses the internet safely >
And otherwise parents have rules such as: ‘Only via Whatsapp and only with children who are in her contacts. No strangers’, ‘We can check text messages at all times’, ‘Don’t say hurtful things about others, no more texting after 7 pm and if something is said that is not okay or nice, show it to us’, ‘ Never forward personal information, say where you live, or send photos.”
Up to the age of 8, about 80% of children are controlled by their parents
There is a high degree of supervision for up to eight years. About 80% is checked. Children over the age of twelve only need to ask for permission and only 57% of the parents can still see what they see. It’s probably just a matter of adjusting every now and then. In the hope that the children have already become so digitally wise that they themselves know well what is and is not wise.
This article can be found in Kek Mama 07-2021.
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