“No one should wake me up in the morning, except the little one”

What would you do differently than Sabri in the movie?

“I would make clearer agreements in advance and make things negotiable. Don’t just wait for the child to arrive. Then you avoid strange surprises like in the movie. Parenting is about compromise, no matter how cliche. For example, my girlfriend has a son who wanted to be circumcised, but his father refused. Then it is important to start and keep talking to each other. As a parent you sometimes have to give in, even if you disagree with the other person. Especially if it is in the best interest of your child.”

Your girlfriend’s baby is like a son to you. How do you experience parenting?

“Parenthood has less fun, but also very nice sides. No one is allowed to wake me up in the morning, except the little one. When he hugs me and puts his arms around me, it’s the best feeling in the world. The only thing that annoys me sometimes is that he makes excuses when he has to go to bed. Then he suddenly asks a lot of questions.”

‘My children should feel the space to come to me with doubts and questions’

How do you see the role of parents?

“I think you shouldn’t overestimate yourself as a parent. I believe that children dare to be themselves more with friends than with their parents. I couldn’t talk at home like I could with my friends. I’ve made a commitment not to raise my kids so much differently, but I do want them to know that they can come to me with literally anything. I didn’t always feel that way with my parents. I was a real insider and it was only in a love relationship that I noticed that talking was relieved. It’s not bad at all to be vulnerable, it can actually help you further. My children must feel the space – when they are in love for the first time, for example – to come to me with doubts and questions. That is important to me.”

Which traditions from Moroccan culture do you take with you into parenthood?

“My parents are Moroccan, I was born and raised here and I think the norms and values ​​here are important. In addition, I also want to share things from Moroccan culture. For example, it is tradition for the mother or mother-in-law to come into the house for a few days shortly after birth to help. As a woman you may not be waiting for that, but it is very normal with us.”

‘It is tradition in Moroccan culture that the mother or mother-in-law comes to help for a few days shortly after birth’

When was the last time you had your hands in your hair? And how did you solve that?

“I don’t have children of my own, but my girlfriend does. I raise her son as if he were my own child. He’s four now and needs to get out of diapers, but he won’t take it. He really has a phobia of pooping. That’s why I started talking to him as if he were my gape is. The result? He pooped on the toilet once and never again, haha. That’s frustrating, but it’s also his character. You don’t change that. I believe that you come into the world as your own person, but also that at some point you are shaped by your age.”

Is there anything you would do differently than your own upbringing?

“At my house they don’t drink alcohol because of religion. I drank and my parents smoked, but we never talked about it. I would do that differently, so it doesn’t happen secretly. When you feel as a child that something is not allowed, you go do it somewhere else. I sincerely believe that many Moroccan boys do not feel the freedom to do certain things at home and therefore go outside. I hope my children feel that freedom with me.”

Oops, I’m Growing! will be available on Netflix from June 9.