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‘My daughters were again given four white men as an example’

Patricia van Liemt is a radio presenter, writer and mother of Maria (12) and Phaedra (9). Every Friday she writes striking, honest, funny and above all recognizable columns about her life and motherhood.

Sometimes I really have to laugh a little at how some people see the world. For example, I recently read the following article in a knowledge magazine about sperm cells: ‘A heavy responsibility rests on the thin body of the sperm cell. He moves through a strange world where dangers lurk everywhere – and the future of humanity depends on the progress of the mission. The sperm cell makes its way to the egg through the acidic environment of the vagina, the sticky mucus of the cervix and the narrow passage of the fallopian tube. I’ll eat my shoe if this piece wasn’t written by someone with the biological male gender.

The patriarchy

But this way of framing, which means seeing things from a certain perspective, has patriarchy as its context. I know, a really stupid word to say. I also had to practice on it. It’s a very important word, which to many may feel like a term from the history books, but it’s something that still plays today. Patriarchy is a form of society in which men have a dominant role. My American colleagues describe it with a little more humour: ‘You feel the icy dick of the patriarchy constantly in your neck’.

Read also – Patricia shocked by group 8 musical: ‘This couldn’t be true, could it?’ >

White men as an example

Well, as much as we (want!) to think that it is no longer the case, I see it everywhere. For example, I recently spent a night in a Bilderberg hotel where I normally like to stay. It was only upon entering that I was immediately reminded that we rather always, without any embarrassment, live in the patriarchy.

“We can frame history in such a way that we look more for equality and diversity”

Four life-sized black and white photographs of men stared at us. It was the so-called founding fathers of the chain. Well, then I’m really disappointed that my two daughters again have four white men to choose from. And no, I am not in favor of canceling history, but we can frame it in such a way that we look more for equality and diversity.

Still going on for decades

For example, plenty of scientific inventions have been made by women, in which a man ended up taking credit for the simple fact that women weren’t allowed to wear that label. Patriarchy is also a business model from which white men still benefit the most. It is of course terrifying to endorse this and so we will be busy for decades to further expose and change this form of society. Fortunately, things are going in the right direction at my house. Our dog is molting and my husband has ordered a new handheld vacuum cleaner and just says ‘I can’t wait for it to arrive’. One day it will all be okay…

Would you rather listen to Patricia’s column? Which can. Every Friday between 2 and 4 pm she reads it on Wild FM.

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