21 things I think now that I’m sick in bed for a week as a mother of two children

It must have been my delivery. Or well, let’s think. No, really that birth of my twins from three years ago. That’s the last time I had to lie in bed for a week. Until now.

Luckily it doesn’t happen often but I was sick. The flu. And not a little ‘oh I’m not that hot’, no. I was deeply touched. Fever, nausea, headache, general malaise in my body. There are much worse things, but I couldn’t get out of bed for a week.

And being sick as a mother is different, isn’t it? You have those two toddlers who yell “mamamamamamamamama” 416 times a day. I thought a lot when I was sick in bed for a week.

1. There would be 762 kilos of laundry if I stayed in bed for another week after this one week.
2. My husband had no idea what it’s like to run errands, pick up kids, cook, put away food, bathe kids, have kids brush their teeth, put kids on a clean romper and put kids to bed and kids 6 more times to send back to bed. After this week, yes. thank god.
3. There’s nothing more exhausting than feeling bloody miserable from some virus and two toddlers arguing over a car. Go soothe it with your thumping head.
4. When you finally fall asleep they come running into the bedroom to check on ‘mama ouch’. Well sweet.
5. Same bedtime as the kids means zero time for yourself.
6. Goddamn how nice that I don’t have to cook.
7. Goddamn how nice that I don’t have to pick up the children at the daycare.
8. God, how nice that I can watch a series during the day.
9. You can be sick as a mother for two days, maximum. Then you just have to turn it back on. Daddy has to work too, so it’s my turn again.
10. Leave them on the iPad for a long time. That’s what those things are for, right?
11. Pfff I’m so bad, will this ever get better? How does it feel to feel fit again? Remember when you used to have a cold or the flu, when you didn’t have kids yet. You don’t have to get out of bed at night for a lost rabbit. You didn’t have to go to that branch playground on Saturday morning to fill the day. New. Then you could really well wallow in self-pity.
12. I have to cry in bed before I fall asleep because I feel so lousy. And then suddenly I miss my children who are sleeping well in a room next to me. How. Must be the fever.
13. I can’t see any more tea.
14. Just enlist the help of grandma and grandpa. Sick another day.
15. sleep sleep sleep. bloody flu. What kind of virus is this? Did another self-test, no corona. Oh yeah. The common influenza still exists. Super.
16. Okay, don’t be like that and just do something. Just an appointment. Just a call. Do some work. It’s okay.
17. Collapsed again. Cheered too early. Straight to bed with the children at 7 pm. How many Advillen are you allowed in a day? In combination with paracetamol?
18. If I don’t get out of bed soon, my kids will eat applesauce for dinner for 7 days.
19. Can that *^!(#)^!&!%&@$ fire engine’s siren be turned off?
20. Hey, wait. I slept for 9 hours. The kids too. They are super sweet and cheerful. And I? My head… The headache is less. The sore throat is gone. The fever is gone. I feel a little bit… Myself again. YES.
21. You know, jokingly this: the flu got me thinking. Because I was in bed for a week with that normal flu and that was over after 10 days, better again. But it made me sad, because how should you as a mother if you have a serious illness? Which might leave you in bed for months, or years? Fortunately I can’t imagine anything, but I do think of all these mothers. I wish you lots of luck, I wish you many lovely men who cook and do the laundry and iPads and comfort and above all health.

Tessa Heinhuis (32) is mother of twins, Bodi and Daaf (3). She lives in Bussum with her husband Billy and their sons and is editor-in-chief of Mama Magazine.