‘In a large family, everyone raises each other’
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Annemarie Geerts (46) is married to Maarten (48) and mother of Jim (22), Sam (20), Juul (18), Guus (12), Saar and Suus (8), Jet (5), Lot (2 ). She doesn’t mind running a family with eight children. “It all comes naturally to us.”
In 2020, Annemarie and her family were featured in the TV show What are they doing?, in which they gave a glimpse into their finances and lives. That caused quite a stir, because the fact that her children didn’t get a birthday party was the ultimate example of parenting failure.
“Yes, we do things differently, and if you deviate from the norm, you will soon not be doing well in the Netherlands. In my opinion, however, happiness cannot be measured by something like celebrating a birthday with many people and expensive gifts, but by how grateful you are. Maarten and I both come from a family where there was plenty of money, it just wasn’t propagated. Where everyone in my class got a new moped on their sixteenth birthday, I got a worn-out Puch. I drove like a dick and was ashamed to death, but it also taught me – only later – that not everything always has to be nicer, better and bigger.”
Out of the house
Annemarie and Maarten ‘kick’ their children out of the house at the age of 21, although ‘kick’ deserves a wink. “Everyone says that it is almost impossible to live on your own around that age. Times have changed, but there really is something to be had if you look hard enough. Jim lives in rooms and shares a toilet with eight people.
Last weekend he came to his mother’s shower because someone had spat on the bathroom. “Then clean it up,” I said. But they wanted to wait for the cleaning lady to come. I don’t think that’s pathetic, that’s how they learn how life works. It is of no use to them if you arrange everything for them.”
Influencer
Annemarie has been an influencer since participating in the TV show. She has almost 70,000 followers that she includes in her family routine on a daily basis. What she earns from her collaborations is set aside for any studies of the children. “If they don’t go to college, we help them find a house, but not immediately. Try living in an anti-squat or in rooms first.”
“I owe my income to my large family. I therefore believe that the money belongs to my children, and not to me”
Educate each other
In a large family, everyone raises each other, she says. “Recently there was a train strike. Juul called her brother who will bring her over. And when Sam was in trouble, he was the first to share it with Jim. He didn’t want to bother us with it. When the younger kids turn their noses up at something I’ve cooked, the teenagers jump right in. “Hey, you don’t talk to Mom like that. She did her best!’
It all comes naturally to us. There is always someone to talk to or play with. I wish every family a Lotje, I wrote the day before her second birthday. People with an afterthought understand that best. Such a large age difference has a binding effect. When I put her to bed, I always do a tour of the teenagers’ rooms. It doesn’t matter how grumpy they are, they all always cheer up from their sister’s happy face.”
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Big family
There is plenty of judgment about her large family. Eight children, you should feel at least extreme shame about that. “I would have no life and no education. Eight children are considered poor. Only when people look at us on Instagram do they see that their prejudice is incorrect.
Only the stubborn group of women on an online forum continue to criticize everything I do. I can only laugh at that. I think it’s also a bit of jealousy. Where many women would have liked to have a third child, but don’t do it because of various objections, I brush all those objections off the table. We just went for it and it works.
“I just brushed aside objections to having another child”
Then no more winter sports, then just build an extra room; nothing is impossible. And then they also see that we have a great time together and that our house is cozy and tidy. Well, if you don’t adapt to what is considered normal, you have to accept that people think something of you.
Structure
The fact that it is not one big chaos in the Geerts House is thanks to Annemarie’s structure. She runs her family like a business.
“I live with lists. If I ticked off everything I wanted to do in a day, I’m happy. It works to give a day a goal, it also gives the children peace and stability. Because we do everything at fixed times and work with a schedule, we always have something to fall back on if there is a hitch in the cable, for example due to a flat tire. Then we just pick up the planning again at dinner, for example.”
