Mama makes her own rules: ‘People do talk anyway’
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Crooked eyes and comments from others don’t bother them much. These mothers don’t care what others think of their parenting style, because it works perfectly for them.
Brenda (37), mother of Maes (6) and Roof (5).
“I am an independent entrepreneur and far from a housewife, cooking wonder and perfect mother. I also think it’s nonsense to pursue that, I don’t have the time and I don’t feel like it. I have little talent especially for cooking. I make a weekly menu, but if I can’t (read: don’t want to) cook, I just make a sandwich or soup with sandwiches. The children love it. In my work I am always sharp and working at full speed, in my private time I prefer to take it easy.”
I don’t anymore
Madelon (39), mother of Anthony (9) and Aiden (5).
“The rat race at school, I am completely fed up with that. Help at impossible times? Making worldly treats? I’m not participating anymore. I throw handout bags of chips over the school fence. I’m not going to spend hours messing around with paper and glue anymore. I prefer to spend my time on things that are important to me. Then I just accept the consequences. Like the slanted eyes of other mothers or the comment ‘it’s always the same ones who show up’.”
Read also – Mama has more than one relationship: ‘For my daughter, the new situation took some getting used to’ >
The best option
Nienke (37), mother of Lena (17) and Tijn (12).
“My children no longer live with me since the divorce. That is the best option for everyone. During our marriage, I took care of the income completely and my ex-husband did the housework and care for the children. We saw no reason to change that. He’s just better at it. And no, I don’t miss my kids if I don’t see them every day. Although I must add that they live around the corner, which of course makes a difference.”
Let them talk
Jacqueline (43), mother of Gino (11).
“I haven’t breastfed, I’m at home on my laptop because it’s necessary for work, I don’t always want to participate in playdates because I simply don’t like all the kids. I have one life and live it the way I want. Some say I am a strict mother. Fine, but my children do have decency and standards. I care what others think of me. People talk anyway.”
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