“If you say you’re three, you can have two ice creams later”

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It won’t make you mother of the year, but you care: the fastest way to the desired result is bribery with children.

Danielle (34), mother of Daan (10) and Max (4):

“Our youngest is a bad eater in the evening. So when we go out to dinner with the family at an all-you-can-eat restaurant, where it’s free up to three years old, I always tell Max to say he’s a year younger. Then I promise him: if you say you’re three, you can grab two ice creams later. Saves me fifteen euros. Recently we were in such a tent again. He asks back in the parking lot: ‘So, am I four again?’”

Read also – ‘My child has become completely insensitive to the phenomenon of rewards’ >

Give a little, take a little

Mariëtte (36), mother of son Jesse (4):

“Actually, the ‘whatever for what’ principle crept into us via a reward system: ‘If you pee or shit in the toilet, you get a sticker. When the sheet is full, you can choose a present.’ That worked for more things. If something difficult had to be done, I would also use it. But the little smart guy soon realized how that worked.

So whenever I asked Jesse to come walk the dog, go to the store, or just sit down to dinner, I heard that little kid’s voice, “Yeah, that’s fine mommy, if you’re with me after that…” And then there was something he wanted: a round of cycling, playing together, staying up longer… I laughed a lot about it, because I caused it myself, and then decided not to use this principle anymore. He still likes to use it, but we don’t fall for it anymore.”

77% of mothers in the Netherlands have to deal with mom shaming, according to research by Kek Mama. The editors found this so shocking that they started a campaign: Kek Mama launches mombracing, the counterpart of momshaming, and calls on all mothers to support each other instead of criticizing from now on.

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